discipline and obedience and my desire for other things

God has me on a journey, a spiritual walk into the discipline of fasting. The following is a piece to the work He is doing within me:

Food has become a quiet anesthesia to the emotions that I feel such as sadness, discouragement, fear of failure, or even depression. Because I have medicated myself with food for so long I have lost what it feels like to sit in the discomfort and call out to my Heavenly Papa. My discomfort hungers for immediate satisfaction and chokes out any growth my spirit desires to undergo. In my weakness I listen to its demand and fill my face with food until I am satisfied and content. Yet it does not last long and I find myself in the seat of agony once again. Here I sit faced with a choice . . . perhaps I'll see what's in the fridge.